Another IWSG has arrived and it's time to share those burning thoughts and feelings. Today I really want to chat about writing along with a certain movie I finally saw yesterday.
I intend to go indept on Friday under the Movie Love segment on my blog. But today I will say that Deadpool indeed broke the fourth wall. It was a movie that really did the anti-hero that is Deadpool good service. While there was talk about the small budget I must say there has been way worse done with movie budgets more than double that. *Coughs* Insurgent. Violence, laughs and touching moments were sprinkled throughout. Definitely worth watching and if not for my budget I would go back to see it several more times.
Plus there were strong females who were treated like real characters and not just eye candy or ultra feminist (I said it). If you can stand violence around a high action movie with few calm moments inbetween involving a superhero/anti-hero then this movie is for you. Also there are some sexual situations but for the squeamish I can tell you they don't last too long.
Now back to sharing. At first I was going to chat about March Madness and that break out tweet I did on Sunday but instead I have a true issue of my own to share. My insecurity this month is that ghostwriting might be draining my ability to write my own work. *Gasp*
Now for any writer that is a horrifying thought. The very work you love and get your paycheck from is mentally draining you at the same time. Now when I work I help shape drafts for writers. I never do final work with one exception for a book to play translation in 2015 that I will never do again. Even with the extra cash I was given it was very stressful and though the customer was willing to get it further polished on their own afterwards, I remember how daunting that was. Editors I respect you even more. I am not a professional editor by any means but you would be surprised by the customers who will still try to turn you into one. But no, I'm not going to earn my money through delusion or deception. Plus with the turnover often demanded by customers the very idea of me doing that on anything other than a draft is laughable at times. You have no idea how many projects I canceled on based on the sheer absurdity of the time the customer wanted me to complete the work in. Especially when they created an order after I told them no.
But the time and work I put into making these drafts better can be both time consuming and creatively draining. Plus my freelance writing also includes creating plots, idea outlines and other services. Usually the customers I do those for don't make draft orders. I think that's better. I keep my work on Fiverr separate from my blogging because I don't want that part of my writing life to interfere with my personal writing life. I have seen how ghostwriting can go wrong. Including when authors put out work declaring so much how much they wrote then get exposed as a result of a suspicious reader doing research on the 'editor' that is named in the book. Guess some ghostwriters need to be in the spotlight. I find it better working in the background. Why give writing to someone else if I am still going to say in some capacity that I wrote it? Sorry, I have my own work to promote.
Now the drafts I write are not final works and are done in collaboration with my customers. I am honest about my minimum experience and the fact I'm not a degree holding writer. Actually lost a few orders that way but most still move forward and love my writing samples. Yet there are those authors who just grab what they get and fling it out there without considering the potential repercussions. I look out for those kind of orders. It is important to go the extra mile if you want to be a certain kind of freelancer. Once I got offered to write multiple drafts. No real details this person just want multiple works done. When I asked for more details it became clear that this customer just wanted a bunch of drafts to slap their name on and publish without regard. Not batting an eye I calmly told that person that this was not my area of expertise. Trust me, that was not what I really wanted to say.
So what do I do in facing this concern and insecurity. Keep writing of course. Yes there are days of late when I can't anything out but that just means there are times when I pour out thousands of words seemingly out of nowhere. Yes it can be daunting getting all these thoughts on the page working both for myself and others in the writing field. But at the end of the day I wanted to be a writer and a fulltime one at that. If that means slowing down some more so my creative juices and brain can catch up...then that's just par for the course. Otherwise I just need to pull up my bootstraps and go find a regular 9 to 5 until I publish my own work and make enough money from that. Also I do enjoy helping people and the gratitude I get as I help these burgeoning writers get their draft done whether to go edit and make into their own masterpiece or to just have a story to read to their son (one of my favorites to remember). The hard work is worth it and insecurities be damned.
What's bugging you right now? Know that no matter what it is you can overcome it. Thanks for visiting my IWSG post and you can check out the full list by clicking here.